London.

Hello, world.

First off, let me apologise. I haven't updated since May and to the... three or four of you that care, this was slightly agitating. Lots of stuff has happened in this recent few weeks, so let me kick off with what was probably the biggest.

LONDON



Yes, for the first time in my bland life, I visited our "glorious" capital. And on the whole, the trip was brilliant.



I went because my cultural cousin Suzy got married to new family member Ian; if ever I happen to mention "my cousin's magazine", that would be theirs - check it out at http://www.nudemagazine.co.uk/. Oh, don't be phased by the title, there's no wobbly bits involved... Well, not many. Anyway. Yeah, me and mum and my sister Josie Jo sat for two and a half hours on a train getting there which was surprisingly fine, and in addition my american auntie and cousin came over too, although we didn't see them ON the train. When we got there the first thing we did was h- actually, the first thing was rush to the toilet. Secondly, we hailed a traditional London cab down which was pretty fun... Please Don't ask me why, I feel like such a tourist.



The cab took us to the wrong hotel, so we walked a little more to the correct one which was pretty damn nice - they had an ice cream vendor there with Ben & Jerrie's, and to get it out the machine used a sucky-in-claw-grabber-thingy. The beds were VERY squishy but that didn't phase us too much. Also, it had a swanky talking lift that made you feel like a king every time you heard "Going up".



After settling in, we went to an italian restraunt for dinner. There we met the bride and groom but the wedding wasn't until the next day so, it was... Umm... Legal. The food was like sex, in food terms. I swear, I ate it all in about ten minutes. I even took PHOTOS of it. If you've ever been to Pizza Express, think that but much nicer. Anyway, enough drooling. When we'd finished we stayed outside, which was also the outside of a bar. There was a nice italian band playing but after they'd had their change toss they vanished. Me and sam ran around for a few hours playing catch and all that before eventually getting a taxi back to the hotel.



The next day was... The big day. Now, this wasn't a conventional wedding; instead of the same old white dress Suzy showed a stunningly awesome Red and black polkadot dress, and I can't remember what Ian was wearing. Instead of a big white cake they had a FANTASTIC wedding-on-the-moon themed one, but if truth be told, there wasn't enough icing in the world to make Suzy's chest it's right size, and nothing small enough to rake off the tiny amounts of excess hair on Ian's head. Other than that it looked fantastic. So the wedding was held in this round government room, with microphones! Oh, lordy, yes! Alfie, who is now walking, by the way, made his way onto one of the buttons so before the ceremony we heard a rather loud GAGOOGURGLEBAHGINGING. So yeah, the exchanging took place, with quite a funny moment of Suzy's; "Do you, Suzanne Prince, take Ia-" "I DO!" typical to be honest. *Chuckle*

Later there was another pretty damn nice nice meal, a very eccentric children's park, then an afterparty that lasted long into the night, including card games, yours truly transforming into an Afro-ninja, speeches, music, dancing, food... It was all good. Taxi. Hotel. TV. Sleep.

The next day! was touriest day. And it rained. Peh! That didn't put us off.
I can't recall too well as I had a bit of a headache from the night before. Here's what we DID do.

- Go to Hamleys. It's heaven. 6 floor of toys. I boguht 2 games. Epic win.
- See the gay pride march, it was actually so awesome! Half-naked young women!! (and men, though...)
- Eat at Pizza Hut. Yum.
- See the big version of me, it wasn't as big as you'd think but still mighty.

And we didn't:

- Go on the eye, too foggy.
- Iron any mermaids (?)
- Join IN with the pride march.

Overrall, classic weekend. Photos and words that'll keep me reminded. That, and Gitaroo man lives!

---------- END OF LONDON SEGMENT ----------